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Bully Managers in IT Workplace: Type 1 of Corporate Psychopaths

Aggression in inherent in psychopath and to tell that a psychopath is a bully is just to tell that the water is wet. But for some of them this pattern of behavior serves as the most favorite tactics and they tend to use it more often and more systematically. Those psychopaths have a distinct a tendency toward sadism and derive perverse gratification from harming others. They like to hurt, frighten, tyrannize. They do it for a sense of power and control, and will often only drop subtle hints about what they are up to. At the same time they polish their aggressive, domineering manner in such a way to disguise any intimidation as legitimate corporate behavior. Such pathological personalities always seek out positions of power, such as teacher, bureaucrat, manager, or police officer. You can also distinguish several subtypes. One not very convincing subtyping was developed by the Workplace Bullying & Trauma Institute. It includes for subtypes:

• The constant critic who uses put downs, insults, name-calling, and makes aggressive eye contact.
• The two-headed snake who pretends to be nice while sabotaging you.
• The gatekeeper is also known as the micromanager and control freak
•  Screaming Mimi is emotionally out of control and explosive.

Ms Horm (cited in MacDonald, 2004) state, “Studies indicate that bullies are actually inept people who are not talented, maybe have a rage against themselves that they express outward toward people they see as being better than they are. It’s from a point of weakness that they express their violence toward others” (p.2). Thus, without the green flag there is little room for the bully boss and it is she or him that must prepare to leave the organization as opposed to the victim of the bullying.

Often bulling behavior is combined with paranoia tendencies (paranoiac self-defense).  Again this category is fuzzy.

1. Many if not all corporate bullies can simultaneously be classified as paranoid managers.
2. Many of them are also belong to the category of micromanagers.
3. Dominant part also falls into the category of narcissists.

I would like to stress it again  that aggression in inherent in psychopath and to tell that a psychopath is a bully is just to tell that the water is wet. 

•  Direct bullying,
• and indirect bullying which is also known as social aggression or indirect bullying.

The latter is characterized by forcing the victim into social isolation. This isolation is achieved through a wide variety of techniques, including refusing to socialize with the victim and criticizing the victim's communication manner or other socially-significant markers.  Indirect bullying is more subtle and more likely to be verbal, such as the silent treatment, arguing others into submission, manipulation, gossip, staring, and mocking. While women can be as aggressive or even more aggressive then men (gender differences in aggression are subject to review; human society is too complex and direct project form animal world for example from great apes is of limited value) they usually are more indirect.

Here is one type from popular literature that fits the pattern:

The Fearmonger Boss. People do what a “fearsome” boss says because they’re afraid of him, which actually encourages further intimidation. He always has a threat, and he constantly follows through with that threat in order to keep his employees acquiescent.

Simplifying you can assume that most "classic types" of corporate psychopaths are simultaneously bullies. For example micromanagers (especially paranoid incompetent micromanagers -- PIMM) often are one trick ponies and just try to hammer suckers who are unfortunate enough to be their subordinates  into complete submission. Like a cancer, most organizations are infested with bullying in one form or another. Side effects of bullying may include low efficiency, bureaucratic muddle, lack of accountability, incompetence, greed, dishonesty and corruption. Bullying at is rife is large corporation. For example BBC managers have been described as "managers and damagers" ! Companies can develop corporate psychosis, corporate narcissism (ref, for example, Enron or Worldcom) or their own brand of Lysenkoism.

As being a bully is typical for all types of corporate psychopath this category, in general,  does not bring you to any deeper understanding of the problem you face. Bullying is just one of the intimidation tactics used by all corporate psychopath, especially narcissists (extremely easy to mix with bullies), micromanagers (more subtle strangulation type of bulling is used in additional to traditional methods of bullying) as well as paranoid bosses ( hypersensitive to critique and often taking offense where none is intended). 

Like with any type of corporate psychopaths only extremely naive people can expect to reform bullies.  Actually the best insight into bulling can be obtained not from reading "bulling self-help" literature, but from literature devoted to the analysis of  the behavior of the leaders of high demand cults.  The same is actually true for narcissists. Neither bullies nor narcissists usually act alone: they try to create their power base of patsies. And  you should not underestimate the role of patsies in bulling.  "Mobbing" -- a group activity at work in which one person is singled out to be eliminated is often the way bullies deal with their targets. Study after study in psychology proves that people draw a perverse strength from the group and will do in a group what they would never do alone. As Susan Dunn noted in her paper  Mobbing in the Workplace Has This Happened to You,

Normal moral behavior, common decency, if you will, is discarded by the same sort of mentality that produces a gang rape. Done by peers, subordinates and/or superiors, the goal is to force someone out using gossip, ostracism, intimidation, discrimination, humiliation, and just plain meanness.

As any psychopath  use violence to achieve their goals, those who are classified as bullies just use it more frequently and are more sophisticated in this type of sadism. Again it is very naive to think that they can stop that practice by appealing to their senses. As psychopaths they have none.

Female bosses are usually more cunning and inclined towards more sophisticated bulling:

• The cold shoulder
• Refusing to communicate with the perceived offender
• Sulking
• Passive aggressive behavior - which respects neither the perpetrator nor the recipient.

They also tend to more often combine direct and indirect intimidation (like ignoring you).  Again this is a kind of low-grade sadism, and most  bullies both male and female are undeniably sadistic and just enjoy to inflict pain. Female just tend to be more  malevolent, mean-spirited, and nasty. I think females constitute larger percentage of micromanagers, especially a special type call paranoid incompetent micromanager. Like one correspondent aptly formulate it: "I hate to say it but female bosses are worse than male bosses when it comes to attitude and bullying." They usually are more malevolent too. When organizational psychologist Mary Sherry wrote in a national newspaper that female managers were far more likely to bully staff than male ones it triggered a large reader response - almost all backing her view.

It is important to understand that bully just want to "get" the target. The bully's criticisms and allegations, are usually based on distortion, blame and fabrication. They are fabrications for the purpose of control. Their typical tactics include:

• Blaming their targets for errors,
• Making unreasonable demands,
• Applying made-up rules inconsistently,
• Threatening workers with job loss,
• Regularly using insults and put-downs,
• Discounting accomplishments and stealing credit for employees' work.

• misuse of power,
• followed by verbal insults
• undermining by overloading or criticism.

Other forms of bullying, in descending order:

• unfair treatment,
• overbearing supervision aka micromanagement (see also a page about micromanagers, who perfected this form of intimidation into an art))
• exclusion,
• spreading malicious rumors,
• blocking promotion or training opportunities,
• making threats about job security,
• sexual harassment,
• physical intimidation and violence.

According to available data women constitute the majority of targets, making up 75% of all victims of bullying. Tanenbaum also found that professional women were often hardest on their own sex [My boss, the bitch]

"Many professional women confess they prefer male rather than female supervisors. They complain that women at work refuse to share power, or withhold information, or are too concerned about receiving credit for every little thing they accomplish, or are cold toward underlings (male and female alike). In such complaints they use the word 'bitch' a lot," she says.

Tim Field believes the stereotypical view of men as aggressive and women as nurturing often prevents the female serial bully from being seen for what she is: "A sociopath in a skirt."

... ... ...

Evelyn Field said female bullies were often more subtle in their behavior than their male counterparts. "Women are usually less physical, they would use techniques such as excluding others, over-supervising and controlling and verbal abuse."

Ricky Nowak, a workplace communications training specialist and head of the company, Confident Communications, says women's bullying is "often quieter, behind closed doors, over the phone, via curt emails, or through giving their staff a sense of . . . (being overwhelmed), for example: asking women with families to stay behind when they don't really have to do so."

Nowak runs leadership groups for professional women and says she has had many disclosures from women admitting they had bullied their colleagues.

"It was behavior such as intimidating others, standing over them, giving colleagues the silent treatment and so on."

Evelyn Field describes bullying as a problem for everyone. "The micro level is the individual target who can be affected emotionally, physically, socially, career-wise, financially, family-wise over a long-term basis and many of them have severe health problems," she says.

"The onlookers also get affected — 20 per cent of onlookers will leave the job, others will have sick days and suffer poor morale. And the cost to industry is enormous — bullying is everyone's problem."

In the article by Roger Dobson published by Independent (Beware the bullying female boss)  the author stated:

"Workplace bullying among women is increasing, partly because they are occupying more senior positions," said Tim Field, an Oxford counsellor who runs anti-bullying workshops. "Women when they are bullies tend to be more manipulative and divisive, whereas men in the same situation are more overtly hostile.

Women also tend to leave less evidence about their bullying activities. "In around 10 per cent of the cases dealt with by the advice line, suicide had been contemplated. Eight cases involved actual suicide." Elaine Bennett, a director of the Andrea Adams charity which was set up to tackle bullying, believes that the increase is probably in areas where women have not been in positions of power before. "Where women have been at the top for a long time, as in health and education, you do get the tyrant matrons and headmistresses."

She says that in some cases women moving into management jobs are copying the male managers who held the job before them. "Women who are finding themselves in roles which hitherto have not been held by a woman - maybe they are the first one on to the board or to be a senior manager - may well take on some of the traits of male managers with much more of a macho aggressive culture," she said. National Workplace Bullying Advice Line: 01235-834548.

Bullies don't usually torment everyone. Like any corporate psychopath bully at times can threaten and manipulate any of his/her subordinates, but usually they are very selective and carefully chose the victim. They like to intimidate people who are somehow bound to the particular place stronger then other or have nowhere to go. The factors that affect target selection include: the depth of the bully complex of inferiority, ability to bully without being punished or confronted, the level of target resistance and skills in countering bulling, etc.  In many cases, the serial bully appears to select targets in the order of his/her perception of danger of exposure of inadequacy.

Often bullies use deception combined with amoral behavior and blatant abuse of power that reminds the behavior of high demand cult leaders. And this analogy is actually far from being superficial. That's why it is extremely important to see bigger picture and along with bulling see all set of tricks used by a corporate psychopath. You need to study the topic and probably get some external help. If you are dealing with a psychopath remember that naivety is your  greatest enemy.  Attempts to "change" a psychopath are doomed and counterproductive.

One often neglected type of bulling is strangulating over controlling (aka micromanagement). Few publications consider it a typical "corporate style" bulling. Among few exceptions is a book "The Bully at Work" by Gary and Ruth Namie  They defined controller in the following way (p. 70)

The bully lives, eats, and sleeps to control others.  She never really experience life in any other way. Living, for her, is to control other with power. The power, real or imaged, she is both in title and her ability to generate fear and chaos in a work group.

Obsessive desire to control other is actually the modus operandi of all corporate psychopaths. Methods used can be different and have quite wide spectrum of individual variety but the essence is always the same: to control and enslave other like members of high demand cult. To protect themselves  from rebellion bullies destroy group solidarity by selecting set of patches and all spend a lot of time in "kiss-up" activities. They are usually well connected and adept in schmoozing up.  Among typical corporate micromanagers is a stereotyped harsh and petty female boss (over promoted secretary) or as this type sometimes called "paranoid incompetent micromanager" (PIMM).

Here are eight typical signs that you are bullied by a corporate psychopath: 

1. Unrelenting petty control of projects and other activities.  Overcontrolling is type of intimidation preferred by psychopaths with obsessive disorder (control freaks); please note that over-control is the type of intimidation that is used in the same way as other intimidation methods. 
    
2. Unfair and/or unexpected critique of your performance. Criticisms and allegations, which are ostensibly about you or your performance and which sometimes contain a grain (but only a grain) of truth. But generally they are targeted at you not your performance.
    
3. Wooden-Stick Behaviors:  Behaving in rigid, inflexible, and controlling ways including severe cases of micromanagement ("my way or highway" mentality). This is typical for all corporate psychopaths but especially well noticeable in bullies.
    
4. You have a distinct feeling that workplace became a constant battlefield
    
5. She constantly ignores you:  do not answer your phone calls and emails.
    
6. She rarely inform you in written and explicit form about your assignments. They prefer using phone instead or pass them via patsies in order to be able to twist it later; at the same he/she expects you to guest their slightest whim and run to do whatever humanly possible to meet their expectations.
    
7. You perceive that the reason for being bulled is that fact that you refuse to be subservient, to not go along with being controlled.  Bully often envy the target skills, knowledge or the ability to work with people.
    
8. Group solidarity is destroyed. Bully instantly and purposely destroys group solidarity. That was they eliminate group resistance.

See also an excellent article by Joan Lloyd Management doesn't mean mind control; use power responsibly in St. Paul Business Journal (November 8, 2002 ). In her WSJ article Overcontrolling Bosses Aren't Just Annoying; They're Also Inefficient Jared Sandberg noted :

Deeply untrusting and puffed up with some devil-in-the-details justification, control freaks wrest tasks from colleagues, along with the colleagues' sense of self worth. It's as if they were burned by someone or something long ago, and everyone they come into contact with is a walking evocation of the past demon. The irony is that in the name of efficiency and cost savings, these managers are often the most guilty of operating far below their pay scales.

Really close to bullies is an extreme type of micromanagers -- control freaks who more use strangulating control then direct attacks although they can use combination of both.  Both are typical and stereotyped corporate psychopath behavior. They are just variations of the same behavior pattern.

One of the better articles on the subject is the column by Tristan Loo How To Deal With a Difficult Boss.

The serial bully appears to lack insight into his or her behavior and seems to be oblivious to the crassness and inappropriateness thereof; however, it is more likely that the bully knows what they are doing but elects to switch off the moral and ethical considerations by which normal people are bound.

Notes: Those pages are written by people for whom English is not a native language. Some amount of grammar and spelling errors should be expected. This is a Spartan WHYFF (We Help You For Free) site. It cannot replace the best teachers and the best books. The site contain some obsolete pages as it develops like a living tree... Some links on older pages are broken. Please try to use Google, Open directory, etc. to find a replacement link (see HOWTO search the WEB for details). We would appreciate if you can mail us a correct link. Search Amazon by keywords:     Open directory Research Index

Old News ;-)

[Mar 9, 2008] Bullying more harmful than sexual harassment on the job, say researchers

Workplace bullying, such as belittling comments, persistent criticism of work and withholding resources, appears to inflict more harm on employees than sexual harassment, say researchers who presented their findings at a conference today.

“As sexual harassment becomes less acceptable in society, organizations may be more attuned to helping victims, who may therefore find it easier to cope,” said lead author M. Sandy Hershcovis, PhD, of the University of Manitoba. “In contrast, non-violent forms of workplace aggression such as incivility and bullying are not illegal, leaving victims to fend for themselves.”

This finding was presented at the Seventh International Conference on Work, Stress and Health, co-sponsored by the American Psychological Association, the National Institute of Occupational Safety and Health and the Society for Occupational Health Psychology.

Hershcovis and co-author Julian Barling, PhD, of Queen’s University in Ontario, Canada, reviewed 110 studies conducted over 21 years that compared the consequences of employees’ experience of sexual harassment and workplace aggression. Specifically, the authors looked at the effect on job, co-worker and supervisor satisfaction, workers’ stress, anger and anxiety levels as well as workers’ mental and physical health. Job turnover and emotional ties to the job were also compared.

The authors distinguished among different forms of workplace aggression.

• Incivility included rudeness and discourteous verbal and non-verbal behaviors.
• Bullying included persistently criticizing employees’ work; yelling; repeatedly reminding employees of mistakes; spreading gossip or lies; ignoring or excluding workers; and insulting employees’ habits, attitudes or private life.
• Interpersonal conflict included behaviors that involved hostility, verbal aggression and angry exchanges.

Both bullying and sexual harassment can create negative work environments and unhealthy consequences for employees, but the researchers found that workplace aggression has more severe consequences. Employees who experienced bullying, incivility or interpersonal conflict were more likely to quit their jobs, have lower well-being, be less satisfied with their jobs and have less satisfying relations with their bosses than employees who were sexually harassed, the researchers found.

Furthermore, bullied employees reported more job stress, less job commitment and higher levels of anger and anxiety. No differences were found between employees experiencing either type of mistreatment on how satisfied they were with their co-workers or with their work.

“Bullying is often more subtle, and may include behaviors that do not appear obvious to others,” said Hershcovis. “For instance, how does an employee report to their boss that they have been excluded from lunch? Or that they are being ignored by a coworker? The insidious nature of these behaviors makes them difficult to deal with and sanction.”

From a total of 128 samples that were used, 46 included subjects who experienced sexual harassment, 86 experienced workplace aggression and six experienced both. Sample sizes ranged from 1,491 to 53,470 people. Participants ranged from 18 to 65 years old. The work aggression samples included both men and women. The sexual harassment samples examined primarily women because, Hershcovis said, past research has shown that men interpret and respond differently to the behaviors that women perceive as sexual harassment.

Source: American Psychological Association

BullyBusters.org Workplace Bullying in the News

The Consultant

Dr. Gary Namie, director of the Workplace Bullying and Trauma Institute in Bellingham, WA, and co-author of The Bully at Work, also says to discriminate between people who are merely difficult ­ but who are rational and can be negotiated with ­ and bullies, whom he calls "difficult people with horns." Bullies can't be reasoned with, he says, because they're "all about power, the abuse of power, the pursuit of power. They have superior communication skills. They will slice and dice you."

That's why, he says, the brilliant comeback line you think up right after a confrontation just won't work. Targets, he says, don't have the ability to be aggressive, so the bully ­ who has trained and rehearsed his aggressions ­ can always keep them off balance. And, he says, "Unless you were born that way, it's hard in middle age to become verbally aggressive."

Aggression, however, is exactly what will back a bully down. "They're cowards," Namie says. "But when you become like them, you've lost."

Instead, he offers these tips:

Don't appease the bully or seek his or her approval. "You don't need their definition of you to survive."
 

Don't backpedal, apologize or jump higher to please the bully.
 

Don't expect human resources to be your ally.
 

Do ask your co-workers to support you. "They can't fire everybody. It breaks the silence and makes it a normal, accountable world. But you've got to ask early. If you don't, it's like crying wolf. Use the power of the group to shame, humiliate and face down the bully."
 

Do make a business case to higher-ups several levels above the bully, appealing to the company's mission, vision and values. "It's a dollars-and-cents issue on absenteeism, turnover, litigation costs, slowed productivity and intangibles like morale. Refine the message to make it unemotional, which is hard to do."
 

Then, he says, take time off to heal. "You've got to be offsite and heal before you can go back and be able to make an unemotional business case."
 

Be clear about your demands. "What do you need to be made whole and safe?"

The Academic

Dr. Loraleigh Keashly, associate professor of communications at Wayne State University in Detroit, says psychological warfare against a bully boss is never a good idea, mainly because the balance of power is unequal, the situation will escalate, and you'll be doubly victimized because others will see you as a troublemaker.

Further, she says, the bully may be of greater value in helping the company achieve its goals. Thus, if the company is forced to choose between a complaining target and a valuable bully, guess who will get the pink slip. However, she says, "Good companies will step in to ask why a formerly good employee now is a troublemaker."

Still, she offers this advice:

Keep a journal, "for yourself and to provide documentation if there's an investigation."
 

If it's early on, confront the bully in a constructive way using basic conflict-resolution techniques. "Over time, your resources to respond become disabled and you're more vulnerable."

If you follow the "Don't grieve, leave" pathway, she says, pursue ways to recover from the damage you sustained. And watch out for what she calls "leaking" ­ carrying your old defenses and hurts into new situations. "Recognize that you are in a new workplace, and that's not the place to work on those issues."

And if, like targets A and B, you're uncertain about how to explain leaving your last position during a job interview, Keashly says, "Keep it professional. Focus on the work you love doing and finding an environment that will enable that work, not the messy details of the position you left." She suggests an approach along the lines of, "The nature of the work I was doing and the kind of support I got didn't match."

[Apr 22, 2005] Kissing up, kicking down by Max McKeownp

Carl Ford's appearance at the senate Foreign Relations Committee proceedings were not without personal risk as he described John Bolton, President Bush's nominee for United Nations ambassador, as 'a quintessential kiss-up, kick-down sort of guy' whose attempt to intimidate a mid-level analyst raises 'real questions about his suitability for high office.'

So why did Carl 'defender of the little people' Ford, come forward to tell the truth about John 'serial abuser' Bolton?

It can't be big P politics because Ford is Republican and conservative so it seems most likely that Ford believes at least two things: that abusing power and authority is wrong and that it is an ineffective style that will damage the objectives of the USA.

Clearly, Ford has an impressive gift for a powerful and damning phrase, but is he correct?

• Let's look first at the evidence describing Bolton's style. In 2002 he berated an analyst and sought to have him fired simply because he disagreed with Bolton's assessment that Cuba has a biological weapons program with the consequence that analysts did not feel that they could speak the truth if the truth ran contrary to the opinions of their superiors.
• It is also alleged that he tried to get a CIA Latin America analyst fired. According to USA Today, 'Rumors of Bolton's temper have swirled around Washington for years', and according to Ford, 'he's got a bigger kick and it gets bigger and stronger the further down the bureaucracy he's kicking.'

Why was the analyst so intimidated that he couldn't speak the truth to Bolton's face?

Bolton on Monday acknowledged trying to get the analyst reassigned but said it was because he had 'gone behind my back', which leaves the obvious question: why was the analyst so intimidated that he couldn't speak the truth to Bolton's face?

Leaders need the truth but Bolton's approach will reduce communication to him to flattery and capitulation. It's something that Machiavelli recognised 500 years ago when he counselled the princes of the Medici family to conduct themselves in such a way that those around them,

• 'realize that the more freely they speak, the more they will please you',
• 'for there is no other way to guard against flattery than by making men understand that by telling you the truth that they will not injure you.'

Machiavelli distrusted flattery because it prevented useful information and discordant voices from being considered by those in power. He reasoned that it was better to have the information and choose to ignore it or act counter to it than to act in ignorance.

And so it is today or tomorrow. Or thirty years ago when the 'infectious optimism' of John F. Kennedy's team allied to the 'arrogance' of the CIA team working for him led to the ludicrous night time amphibious invasion of Cuba, the capture of 1,977 Cuban rebels, and the mortifying embarrassment of the US president. The plan was always doomed to failure but no-one would tell the president the truth to his face. Why not?

The Bay of Pigs fiasco was one of the presidential decisions that received analysis from Irving Janis, social psychologist at Yale, who in 1971 described his, very popular, theory of 'groupthink' as one where faulty decisions are made because of 'a desire for conformity and concurrence within the leadership group at the expense of critical and objective thinking.'

The only trouble with it as a theory was that it could only explain the past retrospectively after it was, like Charles and Camilla's apology, too late.

It would be far better to be able to know in advance which groups, teams or regimes are likely to avoid the truth and make stupendously stupid decisions. This is why a team at the University of California at Berkeley has developed something with the unappealing acronym of GDQS, or Group Dynamics Q Sort, that tests groupthink using a set of 100 questions that assess the groups decision-making dynamics (e.g. 'The group leader is insulated from criticism' versus 'The group is exposed to a wide range of views and arguments').

The team is now assessing governments to see to what extent they are 'well-informed and open to alternatives'. These include the Bush administration and its ability to shield itself from any information that contradicted its desired course of action.

If being open to alternatives really does improve decision making, as Janis and the Berkley group argue, then what are we to make of the view of a contributor to the Al Franken, Air America radio show, who said, in response to the Bolton situation,

'Wake up call: The vast majority of managers at every level in American business and government are mindless thugs, abusive kiss up kick down morons who have not the ability to lead. Welcome to the culture that is the United States of America!'

Is Bolton just a bad man with a bad haircut, poor impulse control and unruly facial hair? Or is he also symptomatic of a management quality issue?

The response of shareholders and boards of directors when confronted with the bad behavior of senior, or junior managers, is often very similar to Senator Richard Lugar, the committee chairman, who distanced himself from Bolton's approach saying, 'obviously, Secretary Bolton's demeanour is not my style', but still felt that he would vote for Bolton because, 'the paramount issue is reform of the U.N. and the confidence President Bush and Secretary of State (Condoleezza) Rice have in this nominee'.

Or, in other words, 'if the Pres wants a bully who am I to argue?' or 'if he gets results then it might be morally distasteful but business is business.'

But being too scary or too powerful stops the truth getting to the very people who need it most. (Think Star Wars - No one ever told Darth Vader that he needed an inhaler and no-one seems to tell Lucas about how his CGI obsession is ruining his legacy).

And so we find a situation where the weak – employees - become targets for abuse and stop sharing valuable truth with their managers, while the powerful - boards and senators - act weak because they are willing to ignore means in return for ends.

But if history demonstrates one thing it is that this kowtowing to bullies is both morally and pragmatically wrong, something the pitiful decisions made by the 'kiss up, kick down' guys will keep proving again, and again, and again.

This article comes from www.management-issues.com

The Age Blogs Management Line

According to the study, Bullying in the workplace - the experience of managers , the most common type was misuse of power, followed by verbal insults and undermining by overloading or criticism. Other forms of bullying, in descending order, were unfair treatment, overbearing supervision, exclusion, spreading malicious rumours, blocking promotion or training opportunities, making threats about job security, sexual harassment, or physical intimidation and violence.

The study found that bullying is most prevalent among line managers. Personality and lack of management skills were usually cited as the main reasons.

... ... ...

I don't know if this fits the definition of bullying, but there's nothing more deflating and de-motivating than a boss who shows no respect for the professional skills and expertise of his staff.

• Posted by: rag at November 8, 2006 11:29 AM

Deliberate withholding of key information.

The person works hard with the information they are given, then at the key moment the secret info is revealed either causing large reworks or used to make the person look like a fool.

Usually management playing politics.

• Posted by: Unwonted at November 8, 2006 12:19 PM

The problem with workplace bullying is that often the perpetrators are very subtle in thier execution. So subtle, that those who are on the receiving end would find it difficult to mount a case.

My workplace has been subjected to bullying for the last few years. The perpetrator is the boss, who has misused and abused his power over this time. He does so by isolating other workers, not feeding them information, taking work away from them, promoting people who support or do not question his decisions.

Over the eyars i have seen work colleagues lose self esteem and become depressed over this situation.

What makes this situation impractical and impossible to change is that the perpetrator is the boss. What makes this situation especially corrupt is that it is occurring within the public service. Over the years, the boss has learnt how to hide and disguise his decisions, so it's almost impossible to take any action.

We can research and write all the reports we want, but until workers have protection and are given the time and attention to deal with these bullying problems, this type of culture will continue to sustain and grow.

• Posted by: Don't Ask at November 8, 2006 12:19 PM

The funny ones are the guys who are real paraniod and insecure.
Selective sharing of information, vague emails to cover their butts, and incomplete handovers can be very frustrating to deal with.
But it's fun to laugh at... amazing how many so called "experts" that are so "flat-out" can find the time to cover all the bases when they are being found out.
People should try to remember that the truth will never condemn you

• Posted by: mxp at November 9, 2006 2:28 PM

I was bullied by two diferent managers, both female, and the bullying took the form of more emotional, passive aggression eg. barbed comments, ignoring you, poor performance reviews even when you had done a good job etc. When I went to HR it was me who was teh trouble-maker, being over-sensitive etc. The irony was, both these companies made a big deal of 'equal opportunities' and a 'safe worlplace', but when it came down to it, did nothing about bulling.

• Posted by: lady at November 15, 2006 3:21 PM

[Mar 26, 2007] Bullying of Academics in Higher Education

March 26, 2007 (bulliedacademics.blogspot.com ) The green flag is clearly essential to the bully boss. As Ms Horm (cited in MacDonald, 2004) state, “Studies indicate that bullies are actually inept people who are not talented, maybe have a rage against themselves that they express outward toward people they see as being better than they are. It’s from a point of weakness that they express their violence toward others” (p.2). Thus, without the flag there is little room for the bully boss and it is she or him that must prepare to leave the organization as opposed to the victim of the bullying.

... ... ...

Perpetrators typically use five methods to reduce the indignation. (1) Cover-up: the action is hidden. Torture is almost always carried out in secrecy. (2) Devaluation of the victim: if the victim is thought to be dangerous, inferior or worthless, then what's done to them doesn't seem so bad. That's why enemies are labelled as ruthless, subhuman and terrorists. (3) Reinterpretation: a different explanation is given for the action, making it seem more acceptable, or blaming someone else. The protesters might be called dangerous and threatening. Or shooting them might be claimed to be an accident, or the action of "rogue" elements. (4) Official channels: experts, formal inquiries or courts are used to give a stamp of approval to what happened. Justice appears to be done, but actually isn't. For example, an inquiry into prison abuse might take months or years and lead to minor penalties against a few scapegoats. Meanwhile, public anger dies down and the system remains in place. (5) Intimidation and bribery: victims and witnesses are threatened or given incentives to keep quiet and not oppose what happened. Witnesses to a brutal assault might be threatened that they could be next.

Employers regularly use these same five methods in unfair dismissal.

(1) Cover-up. The person dismissed knows what happened, but others are kept in the dark. No announcement may be made. Settlements often involve a silencing clause. When the dismissal is public, often the reasons are covered up. Files may be destroyed.

(2) Devaluation. The person dismissed is slandered as a poor performer, difficult personality or slacker. Rumours may be spread alleging theft, bullying or unsavoury sexual behaviour.

(3) Reinterpretation. The dismissal is said to be due to restructuring, redeployments, financial difficulties or some other pretext. Alternatively, the dismissal may be justified as due to the victim's failures.

(4) Official channels. Dismissed workers are advised to go to tribunals, ombudsmen, courts, or any of a host of other agencies that supposedly offer justice. Seldom do these address the source of injustice in the workplace.

(5) Intimidation and bribery. Workers may be reluctant to oppose a dismissal because they will receive a poor reference or be sued for defamation. Co-workers may support management in the hope of retaining their own jobs, a form of implicit bribery.

So here are some ways to prevent dismissal by good preparation.

• Collect lots of information about your own good performance. Keep copies in safe places. If you plan to act against corruption or bad practices, collect extensive information to back up your claims.
   
• Develop your skills in speaking and writing. Know how to talk with others. Learn how to write persuasive accounts, how to prepare a leaflet, how to run a publicity campaign and how to set up a website - or have reliable friends willing to assist.
   
• Avoid doing things that can be used against you. If you spend much of your time bad-mouthing others, getting others to do your work, and claiming credit for what you didn't do, you can't expect support when the crunch comes. Have others help you gain insight into being collegial, collaborative, approachable and civil.
   
• Be prepared to survive. You may need financial reserves. You will need psychological toughness. You need exercise and good diet to maintain your health. You need supportive relationships. When you come under attack, you may need all your reserves: financial, psychological, physical and interpersonal. If you're living on the edge, you're more vulnerable.
   
• Build alliances: there is great strength in collective action. If you have a decent union, join it and be active.
   
• Develop options. Find out about other potential jobs. Think about a career change. Consider downshifting to a less costly lifestyle. Sometimes it's better to walk away from a stressful job. If you have such options, you're actually in a stronger position to campaign against an unfair dismissal.
   
• Be prepared to resist. Many workers learn to be subordinate and can't bring themselves to resist even the worst abuse. When dismissed, they do just what the boss wants: leave quietly, perhaps with token compensation. If you're known as a resister, you're less likely to be targeted.
  
  Help others. If you assist other workers who come under attack, you develop useful insights and skills - and others are more likely to help you should you need it.

[Mar 24, 2007] How to cope when the boss is a bully

(MSNBC.com)Linda Barkdoll, Coordinator of the Human Resources Development graduate program at McDaniel College, offers some tips when you’re caught up in a boss’ fury:

• Do not escalate the boss's ill humor by being argumentative, or shouting back.
• Do not be insubordinate.
• ... ... ...
• Use a calm and quiet voice when speaking to the boss. It can have a de-escalating, calming effect.
• ... ... ...
• If the situation is unbearable, or the boss is hopeless, consider finding another job. Your physical and mental health should not be sacrificed to keep the boss happy.

[Feb 24, 2007] Epinions.com - Workplace mobbing - My experience

The Bottom Line Be strong and believe in yourself. Don't think like a victim.

Workplace mobbing - My experience
May 24 '06

The Bottom Line Be strong and believe in yourself. Don't think like a victim.

Description of mobbing:

Mobbing is a modern term for systematic bullying, harassment, or psychological terror, especially in schools and workplaces, whereby one person is "ganged up" on and stigmatized by peers and/or superiors for reasons that are not genuinely or justifiably known to most of those who are mobbing the victim.

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mobbing

How I Was Mobbed At Work
Basically, my supervisor would do almost anything to demean or minimize me in the eyes of my co-workers.

Insulting jokes, negative comments about my work, the way I staple papers, my appearance.

If she asked me a question, it would be in an accusing manner, instead of simply a request for information.

She would tell people that I have an bad temper and to be careful of what you say to me. I may "blow up".

Or tell people that I was attracted to her and wanted to date her.

Another favorite was for her to speak to someone with her hand to her mouth and point at me with the remark, "Don't worry, I'm not talking about you", then laugh.

The common thread here is all of the above always took place in front of an audience.

Human nature being what it is, the co-workers went along with the supervisor and her theme, eventually doing themselves what previously only the supervisor would do.

It got to the point that if I spoke to anyone at all, people would giggle or raise their eyebrows and smile at me or each other.

How I Tried To Stop It
In my ignorance I tried to ignore everything. I felt that if I ignored it, they would stop if I didn't respond or defend myself. All that did was make me frustrated and angry and it probably encouraged my supervisor and co-workers.

I tried talking to the supervisor. She denied everything and accused me of being paranoid. The subject of our "talk" then became the source for new material to use against me in front of my co-workers.

I finally lost my temper and did "blow up". That was a temporary fix but all I accomplished was to reinforce the negative perception of me the supervisor was creating.

How I Stopped It
I have one of those mini tape recorders and I made an audio recording of my supervisor and her "crew" harassing me and I played it for my supervisors boss. [ Note that this might illegal in some states]

It didn't cure the underlying problem which caused the mobbing. But I was no longer being mobbed.

What I Learned
These are written as statements but they express my beliefs rather than what may be factual. In other words, my opinion.

1. My co-workers went along with my supervisor out of fear and instinct. That they felt if they did not go along, they would be aligned with me and also be targeted.

2. My supervisor was/is not suited for being in charge of employees. Possibly she is a sociopath.

3. While there are laws about harassment, the laws mean nothing unless someone is willing to act on them.

4. Ignoring mobbing will never make it go away.

5. Never accept harassment as being the price for having a job.

6. Never accept responsibility for being harassed.

7. The people who harass you are not your friends. That may seem obvious but it isn't. In most cases the mob includes people you previously got together with after work, or shared rides to and from work.

Your co-workers who become part of the mob may in the future be civil to you but they should never again be considered as someone to trust.

Their fear and weakness which caused them to mob you is not a quality you want in a friend. After all, if your "friends" refused to go along with the crowd, the mobbing would be done by a much smaller mob. Just keep your distance but remain civil and civilized. You don't have to like them.

8. If you find yourself again being harassed or mobbed, immediately make it known to several layers of management. For example send an email to your supervisor and a copy to his or her direct supervisor. Print and keep a copy for your own records.

[Feb 1, 2007] JCU - Female bullies

We hear so much of women as victims and the disadvantages women encounter in employment, that it sometimes comes as a surprise to realize that women are equally as capable of bullying behavior as men.

Women are supposed to be co-operative rather than competitive, more inclined towards empathy, and less towards seeking dominance. Women are often portrayed as caring more than men about personal experience and feelings.

It may be true that women are less inclined to indulge in vocalized rages - public swearing and shouting - and in physical violence, though I am sure that all of us could think of exceptions. Research indicates, however, that women are inclined towards

• The cold shoulder
• Refusing to communicate with the perceived offender
• Sulking
• Passive aggressive behavior - which respects neither the perpetrator nor the recipient.

Such behavior is evidence of women's socialization: often we do not know how to elicit positive attention, or to assert ourselves so that our views and rights are recognized and respected. So we use inappropriate and ineffectual means to attract attention any way we can. We have been conditioned very early that girls do not shout and scream. No one is surprised, however, if girls go quiet or even sulk.

The problem, however, is that unless people communicate, they will not resolve their differences.

What comes as a shock to many people is just how personally and educationally damaging social and professional isolation and exclusion from networks can be.

 

D Gray, Manager, Equal Opportunity, 2003

May be reproduced with acknowledgement

Mobbing Emotional Abuse in the American Workplace, 2002 Revised Edition Books Noa Davenport, Ruth D. Schwartz, Gail Pursell Elliott

seek help and leave the environment, March 21, 2005
 

Reviewer:

a. reader - See all my reviews

I'm currently dealing with the affects of this type of cowardly behavior, and I would like to send a message to anyone who has found themselves here at this web page:

If you "feel" like this is happening to you, if you "think" this may be happening to you, if you are waking up in the middle of the night, by intrusive thoughts and worries surrounding your work situation, and wondering what is wrong with yourself, then trust your instincts. Leave the environment and seek help. Please do it for the good of yourself, your health, and your loved ones.

This has been one of the most crushing, defeating experiences of my life. I hope that I can at least help keep someone from making the same mistakes in not trusting in their own perceptions.

Don't worry about revenge via lawsuits, or fighting back, or personal pride. Be concerned about your own mental and emotional well being. Surround yourself with people who give a damn about you. Seek resources such as this book in order to understand your situation, and try your best to start dusting yourself off.

These types of environments are severely ill and fronted by phonies. They are the most ignorant, the most scared and would be the first ones to crumble under the same circumstances you have found yourself. There is no honor or valour where you are at. Let them be. Rise above it, and out of it... 

Mobbing in the Workplace Has This Happened to You, by Susan Dunn

Study after study in psychology proves that people draw a perverse strength from the group and will do in a group what they would never do alone. Normal moral behavior, common decency, if you will, is discarded by the same sort of mentality that produces a gang rape. The new manager whose reports decide to drive him out ... the competent but beautiful new receptionist who's pulled down by jealous co-workers ... the manager who becomes threatened by the talents of a report ... Done by peers, subordinates and/or superiors, the goal is to force someone out using gossip, ostracism, intimidation, discreditation, humiliation, and just plain meanness.

The blame is projected on the victim, who, 'gas lighted,' becomes confused, has trouble perceiving correctly (that people could really do this), and accepts that he or she is incompetent, to blame, etc.

Dr. Heinz Leymann, German industrial psychologist, is credited for identifying the syndrome in Europe, Japan and Australia where he studied it for nearly 20 years. He lived in Sweden and estimated that 15% of the suicides in Sweden were the result of mobbing in the workplace. It is cruelty in the extreme, a group bullying process that can go or weeks, months, even years, until the job is done. When interviewed, mobbers often claim they didn't know they were harming anyone.

Mobbing is a particularly insidious form of emotional abuse, and the impact on the individual can be devastating. The authors cite cases of individuals unable ever to return to work after mobbing. In addition, mobbing is a serious behavioral risk-management issue for organizations. It destroys morale, erodes trust, cripples initiative, and results in dysfunction, absenteeism, resignations, guilt, anxiety, paranoia, negativity, and marginal production. Key players leave and the effects are long-lasting.

Mobbing is a "widespread, vicious, workplace tort [civil wrongs recognized by law as grounds for a lawsuit--and in this case an intentional tort]," says Scott H. Peters, Esq. of The Peters Law Firm. P.C., Iowa (quoted in the article "Did You Hear of Mobbing?" by Elliott. It is difficult to stop once it gets going, but managers can learn to recognize the patterns.

In the book the authors even cite cases where HR managers were 'ordered' by superior 'mobbers' to support a mobbing process.

In personal correspondence with Ms. Elliott, she told me that people often come up to her after her talks and say, "This will never happen again on my watch," which is heartening. Emotional intelligence (EI) and awareness in the work place are one of the antidotes to mobbing.  

Scientific American Mind Stopping the Bullies

Systematic Abuse

Psychologists and behavior researchers have only seriously studied mobbing--group bullying--among students since the beginning of the 1980s, led in large part by Norwegian psychologist Dan Olweus of the University of Bergen. In his pioneering study of Swedish and Norwegian students, Olweus concluded that children can be very skilled in systematically using their social clout at the expense of weaker schoolmates. The goal is to enhance their own position.

Mobbing thrives in hierarchical settings because they allow dominance and strength to reign as the measure of an individual's social value. It is therefore not surprising that prisons and military bases, with their emphasis on rules and rank, are often the scenes of mobbing. Schools, in which older or stronger children can lord their age and power over younger or weaker ones, share similar traits. Thrown into a diversity of personalities, certain individuals try to create a social structure that confers on them an advantage. And usually that power is wielded to abuse others.

According to the National Center for Education Statistics, in 2003 some 7 percent of U.S. students ages 12 to 18 reported that they had been bullied at school in the past six months. (And certainly far more never said a word.) The likelihood of bullying was highest in the younger grade levels: 14 percent of sixth graders, 7 percent of ninth graders and 2 percent of 12th graders reported that they had been picked on. A 2001 study by the Kaiser Family Foundation and Nickelodeon found that 74 percent of eight- to 11-year-olds reported the existence of bullying at their school; 86 percent of 12- to 15-year-olds also noted bullying.

Sufferers must usually face the harassment alone. Other boys and girls generally take the side of the perpetrators, fearing that they could be next in line. Or they pretend events did not happen and keep their mouths shut. Few find the courage to stand up for their fellow students. In the end, mobbing affects the entire school atmosphere, not just the bullies and their targets.

Power-Hungry Predators
To learn about what motivates the abusers, a research team (of which I was a part) at the University of Munich conducted a long-term study of 288 second and third graders from different elementary schools in southern Germany. We questioned them about their experiences: What kinds of children were apt to fall prey to bullies? How did the rest of the class react? We interviewed the same children six years later, when they were in the eighth and ninth grades. We asked if former victims were still targeted. And we asked how victims dealt with such problems now that they were teenagers.

Our first important finding was that bullies can be identified early in elementary school: even at a tender age, they are able to organize a mob against certain individuals. They appear to always be on the lookout for new kids to pick on. And they find it difficult to abandon their roles over time; perpetrators tend to remain perpetrators over many months and even years.

Bullies are usually very dominant children who have learned early on that they can become the leader of a group by being aggressive. Their modus operandi is to humiliate a student who is physically or psychologically susceptible to rise to the top of the social order. They try to force others to kowtow to them by acting tough, and other children may oblige simply out of fear. Often the bullies have learned about the power of aggression at home.

Researchers at the University of Arizona who studied more than 500 middle school students found that the children most likely to engage in bullying had experienced more forceful physical discipline from their parents, had viewed more TV violence and had fewer adult role models. To a degree, they had learned by example.

... ... ....

Helping the Victim

Further understanding of what makes bullies prevail will help break down their sources of power. In the meantime, though, more should be done to minimize the long-lasting effects on those who are hurt. In 2002 my colleagues and I interviewed 884 men and women from Germany, the U.K. and Spain, more than 25 percent of whom recalled having suffered physical and psychological attacks by other children when they attended school. Their bitterness at being excluded and threatened continued to affect them in their adult lives. Former mobbing victims more frequently had trouble developing trusting relationships and lacked confidence when interacting with other adults. Their expectations of themselves and others were lower than average. The one positive note was that their previous experience was not usually repeated in their work lives, although mobbing in the workplace--the ganging up of subordinates or superiors through rumor, innuendo, intimidation, humiliation, discrediting and isolation--does happen.

The long-term consequences of mobbing make clear that early prevention is critical. The tricky task of intervening at the right moment falls to teachers and parents--who may not be prepared to act appropriately. For example, Norwegian students told a government ombudsman that adults do not even recognize their predicaments in the classroom.

[Feb 19, 2007] BBC - h2g2 - Tips on How to Deal with Difficult People

Whenever someone becomes intolerably belligerent on the phone, put them on hold and let off steam with your co-workers or calm yourself by literally counting to ten. This invariably makes your co-workers laugh, which makes you laugh and realize that the person on the other end of the line has no bearing on your life and that you shouldn't be taking the situation all that seriously.

When you get back on the phone with them, you are calm and cool. Instead of shooting stupidities right back at them, use logic, tell them what they need to know, thank them for their call and hang up.

One of the best policies for dealing with people who are grating a bit on one's nerves is to be honest (you'll get caught if you try to lie) but don't reveal anything about yourself. If they don't know you, then they can't hurt the real you. Inside, you are laughing, while the outside is free to look upset or offended if it will get the job done.

Kill them with Kindness

Experience throws up two constants:

1. Most of the things people say while in any kind of bad mood are not meant, are unmeditated, and are the verbal equivalent of a roaring animal.
2. Responding like with like only ever aggravates a situation further and reaches no positive conclusion.

Any Jerry Springer will serve as proof of this.

So, the best response is to rise above all provocation and attempt to deal with difficult behaviour in a calm and understanding way. Here's one Researcher's experience:

Having spent over a decade in retail customer service, I've found the best way to deal with problem people is to kill them with kindness. I know it sounds hard to do, but it really works the best. When someone comes into a store in a bad mood, nine times out of ten it is something other than the store itself that has made them mad. They want to drag someone down with them. Smile real big and completely ignore anything offensive they've said. Example:

Angry customer - 'Do you work here?!? Can you help me?!?'

You (with nauseatingly big smile) - 'Why, certainly, sir! What can I help you with today?'

Nothing works better to burst their bubble. When they find their anger will get them nowhere, what else can they do? It works even better if you can get them what they want right away, because then they have to go into sheepish mode.

Dealing with difficult people in a calm and tolerant manner will most likely ease their tempers down somewhat. It also helps, if you're dealing with aggravated customers, if you know what you're talking about, or at least try to sound as if you know what you're talking about. If you can sound confident in what you are saying you are more likely to get your point through than if you sound uncertain. Most people that are already angry about something will be able to pick up on the uncertainty of the other party and use this uncertainty to strengthen their own argument.Teenagers

Oh this one is really easy - how to deal with teenagers. I only really have experience of male ones, but my one lives in a completely different time warp from me, I never see him... and if I do ever see him standing up he only says 'Uuurrghh!' so what's the problem? While he's sleeping he's not eating, so that's around 16 hours per day sorted. The rest is OK too, he's got a computer, so that's another quiet pastime. I don't think he has the energy to be a problem (bless him!). Of course, things could change...

Not all of us are blessed with such easy-to-please teenagers, so what do you do if you do have a youngster who is hard to handle? If you tell them you will do something, make sure you do it. The point with any difficult child is to never make threats you won't keep, never attempt to patronise them, unless you are sure you will get away with it. It will only make matters worse.Teenagers

A Researcher's experience:

I can't tell you how to handle these as an adult or a parent, but as the little brother, I tried the nice approach which failed much like the attempt of my scrotum to accommodate the same space and time as my sister's knee. Hitting back was no good either. There is no use seeking help with your parents because they are completely terrified of the teenage monster. Basically what I did was to try and keep a low profile until I got larger than her, by then she stopped recognising my existence altogether.

For some strange reason, today we get along just fine. Well, maybe you can chalk it up to me still getting bigger and her staying the same size...

Whenever you have to deal with an unruly person, it's best to keep a level head about your shoulders, no matter how much they annoy you. If you get angry right away, there's no chance that the dispute, whether it be with your fiancé, sister, mother etc, will be resolved quickly or without upsetting everyone involved. If you can't see the problem from the difficult person's point of view, ask them. While this may not work with some, it's usually a good idea in the case of closer relationships. The trick is, in arguments, you need to have patience with the other person, and self-restraint with yourself. Then, not only will you both get a different point of view, but also more respect for each other.  BBC Links

• In case your orbito frontal cortex isn't in order, check out how to recognise angry expressions.
• Stress can make you feel miserable. Find the answer to the question How can I stop feeling so stressed

[Feb 19, 2007] 5 Tips Dealing with an abusive boss -  By Gerri Willis

Oct. 15, 2004 ( money.cnn.com )Then there are the gatekeepers -- people who are obsessed with control -- who allocate time, money and staffing to assure their target's failure. Control freaks ultimately want to control your ability to network in the company or to let your star shine. Another type is the screaming Mimis who are emotionally out of control and explosive.

2. Don't take it lying down

If your boss has a difficult management style, you don't have to let their bad behavior go. You can respond -- just remember to stay professional.

So, if your boss insults you or puts you down, Susan Futterman, author of "When You Work for a Bully" and the founder of MyToxicBoss.com, suggests responding with something like, "In what way does calling me a moron or an idiot solve the problem? I think that there's a better way to deal with this."

If you find out that your boss is bad-mouthing you to higher-ups in the company, confront them directly and professionally. Get the evidence in writing from your source if you can. Then, ask him or her what is causing them to do this.

You could say, "I've been hearing from other people in the company that you're not happy with my work, you and I know that this isn't the case and I want to talk about how we can fix this."

If your boss has been defaming you, that's illegal. You may want to consult an attorney.

If your boss is a control freak who's breathing down your neck, you should address it. Say, "I can't function effectively if you're going to be micromanaging me and looking over my shoulder all the time. If I'm doing something fundamentally wrong, let's talk about it. But this isn't working."

If someone screams at you, don't be a doormat. If you've made a mistake, acknowledge it. But let your boss know that they're creating a difficult work environment. Even if you haven't made a mistake, you may want to calmly ask what they're upset about and if you can address it.

3. Take notes. Documenting your boss's bad behavior is key for two reasons, according to Futterman.

First, you might not even realize the extent of the problem. Futterman explains, "Taken in isolation, these events may seem trivial, but taken as a whole, it often becomes more clear what's actually going on. Some victims may be in denial or discount these events as isolated incidents. Your written records can document how severe the situation is."

And, of course, if you decide to take legal action down the line, you may need the information. It's best to document these incidents as soon as possible so they're fresh in your mind.

Documentation is also important if you plan to report the behavior to your boss's boss or to your company's human resources department. And don't dismiss the idea of taking the bull by the horns and working toward a solution.

Try arranging a face-to-face meeting with your boss. Tell them you want to discuss the problems you've encountered because you want to resolve them.

Chances are often slim that this will work, however. If they reject the opportunity to discuss things with you, add that to your documentation.

4. Know when it's too much.

Bosses may exhibit bad behavior sometimes. Hey, no one is perfect, not even bosses. But if your boss is abusing you, that's a problem.

The problem takes on greater urgency if the abuse starts to make you feel bad. If you chronically suffer high blood pressure that started only when you began working for your boss; or you feel nauseous the night before the start of the work week; or if all your paid vacation days have been used up for mental health breaks.

When the bullying has had a prolonged affect on your health or your life outside of work, it's time to get out. It's also time to leave if your confidence or your usual exemplary performance has been undermined.

Ironically, targets of abusive bosses tend to be high achievers, perfectionists and workaholics.

Often bully bosses try to mask their own insecurities by striking out.

5. Control your destiny.

Even after you leave your nightmare boss, you'll still have to explain why you left to potential new employers.

Futterman advises against dramatizing your old work situation. One way to gracefully sidestep the issue: say you and your manager had a longstanding disagreement over the most effective way of getting things done and you thought the most professional way to resolve it was to move on.

"You certainly don't want to start recalling and recounting the abuse you suffered. You'll inevitably get upset and that's not the way you want to handle a job interview," she says.

Try to control the interview situation to the extent you can. Don't give your abusive boss as a reference but rather someone else with whom you worked previously. Another good choice might be a colleague or a peer you're on good terms with or someone who can speak about you professionally.

Also, if you only worked for your bullying boss for a short time, you may want to consider leaving that job off your resume altogether

[Feb 19, 2007] Beat crime, anti-social behaviour, bullying, abuse and mobbing with emotional intelligence (EQ)

Like a cancer, most organisations are infested with bullying in one form or another. Side effects of bullying may include low efficiency, bureaucratic muddle, lack of accountability, incompetence, greed, dishonesty and corruption.

Bullying at the BBC, for example, is rife. BBC managers have been described as "managers and damagers" !

Companies can develop shared psychosis, corporate psychosis, corporate narcissism (ref, for example, Enron or Worldcom) or their own brand of Stalinism.

[Feb 10, 2007] Your Abuser in Therapy

In their article, "A Comparison of Impulsive and Instrumental Subgroups of Batterers", Roger Tweed and Donald Dutton of the Department of Psychology of the University of British Columbia, rely on the current typology of offenders which classifies them as:

"... Overcontrolled-dependent, impulsive-borderline (also called 'dysphoric-borderline' – SV) and instrumental-antisocial. The overcontrolled-dependent differ qualitatively from the other two expressive or 'undercontrolled' groups in that their violence is, by definition, less frequent and they exhibit less florid psychopathology. (Holtzworth-Munroe & Stuart 1994, Hamberger & hastings 1985) ...  Hamberger & Hastings (1985,1986) factor analyzed the Millon Clinical Multiaxial Inventory for batterers, yielding three factors which they labeled 'schizoid/borderline' (cf. Impulsive), 'narcissistic/antisocial' (instrumental), and 'passive/dependent/compulsive' (overcontrolled)... Men, high only on the impulsive factor, were described as withdrawn, asocial, moody, hypersensitive to perceived slights, volatile and over-reactive, calm and controlled one moment and extremely angry and oppressive the next – a type of 'Jekyll and Hyde' personality. The associated DSM-III diagnosis was Borderline Personality. Men high only on the instrumental factor exhibited narcissistic entitlement and psychopathic manipulativeness. Hesitation by others to respond to their demands produced threats and aggression ..."

... ... ...

Impulsive batterers abuse only their family members. Their favorite forms of mistreatment are sexual and psychological. They are dysphoric, emotionally labile, asocial, and, usually, substance abusers. Instrumental abusers are violent both at home and outside it – but only when they want to get something done. They are goal-orientated, avoid intimacy, and treat people as objects or instruments of gratification.

Still, as Dutton pointed out in a series of acclaimed studies, the "abusive personality" is characterized by a low level of organization, abandonment anxiety (even when it is denied by the abuser), elevated levels of anger, and trauma symptoms.

It is clear that each abuser requires individual psychotherapy, tailored to his specific needs – on top of the usual group therapy and marital (or couple) therapy. At the very least, every offender should be required to undergo these tests to provide a complete picture of his personality and the roots of his unbridled aggression:

1. The Relationship Styles Questionnaire (RSQ)

2. Millon Clinical Multiaxial Inventory-III (MCMI-III)

3. Conflict Tactics Scale (CTS)

4. Multidimensional Anger Inventory (MAI)

5. Borderline Personality Organization Scale (BPO)

6. The Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI)

These tests are the topic of our next article.

Girl power are women the worst bullies - 08-02-2005 - Personnel Today

When organisational psychologist Mary Sherry wrote in a national newspaper last month that female managers were far more likely to bully staff than male ones it triggered a large reader response - almost all backing her view.

When organisational psychologist Mary Sherry wrote in a national newspaper last month that female managers were far more likely to bully staff than male ones it triggered a large reader response - almost all backing her view.

Why are some women much worse bullies than their male counterparts?

One female respondent to Shelly's article said: "Women bosses are worse bullies than men. I also agree with Sherry that usually they employ more insidious tactics such as isolating people and nit-picking in order to undermine the other person's confidence."

Another wrote: "Your article has provoked me to put down on record that the unhappiest years of my life were caused by female bosses. I was treated so badly that I lived in a state of fear for the last few years of my employment."

And a third said: "I work for a government department and have been off work since late October due to stress and anxiety exacerbated by a two-year campaign by my female line manager. Women bosses are certainly worse than men at bullying."

Sherry said the level of response was surprising but not the content. "During the work I have been involved in for the past 12 years all cases of bullying that I have come across have involved women as the bully, though I am certainly not saying that all female managers are bullies.

"I don't want to say how many bullying cases exactly we have dealt with but it is certainly more than double figures."

She said these cases show that female bullies rarely match stereotypical images of aggressive bullies who use physical intimidation and foul language to cower their victims.

Their approach is a lot more subtle and psychological. They nitpick and undermine through constant criticism which leads to those on the receiving end losing their self-confidence and becoming risk and responsibility averse.

So who are these bully-girl bosses?

In Sherry's view they tend to be middle managers who are managing beyond their level of competence.

"For example when they are asked to perform at a certain level and don't have the managerial competence to get the best out of people they may bully. I don't think people actually decide to become bullies. It is because they don't have the competence to fulfil their management role."

And who, typically, are their victims?

According to Sherry the victim is rarely a new starter. They tend to have been employed for 18 months to 15 years. "A new female manager is brought in and undermines the person concerned by nit-picking and disempowering them."

She said that although it sounds like she is banging her own drum she does not think internal HR departments are best at dealing with serious bullying cases, especially if they involve senior staff.

"It is very difficult for internal investigators to look into bullying cases," Shelly said. "HR departments often don't have the level of delicate questioning techniques."

Nor is she a fan of befriender networks where bullying victims can seek advice and support from colleagues. "They don't work. We have seen one company use a befriender programme and we told them `you are wasting your money'. They set it up for two years and no one used it.

"You cannot expect a progress chaser or admin clerk to become a bullying adviser."

Sherry is a partner at Southport firm Asset Management Partnership which advises clients on preventing and eradicating bullying in the workplace. It runs a website, www.bulliesatwork.co.uk which features an online questionnaire where victims can answer questions about their experiences.

Employee wins £56,000 in “worst ever” case of workplace bullying - Forum - Workplace Law Network

Actually, I have found that more women than men actually bully. Weaker men in positions of "power" (management) allow it to go on, as well.

Here's a link to another case that's going on at the moment, due mainly to women bullying, yet again (and a weak male boss!):

http://www.theyworkforyou.com/wrans/?id=2006-05-17a.50.0&s=section%3Awrans+speaker%3A13667#g50.1

I believe the person bringing the case is suing privately...

Psychology Today Bad Boss, Sick Employees

Employees exposed to difficult or unjust circumstances may not only become sullen and unproductive workers: they may get physically sick, as well.

... ... ...

Although plenty of research has linked stress to poor health, there is no comparable study on workplace justice. However, studies about bullying and psychological violence in corporate culture prove that the phenomenon exists in the U.S., says Steve M. Jex, Ph.D., an associate professor of psychology at Bowling Green State University in Ohio. Such situations may be on the rise due to the stagnant economic climate.

"Organizations are getting more harsh, what with layoffs and people being escorted off the premises" after they've been let go, says Jex, noting that studies like Kivimaki's can be useful in a culture where most workers stifle complaints and put up with whatever the boss dishes out.

RadarMy boss hates me

... women are just as likely to be bullies as men. According to British antibullying campaigner Tim Field, at least half of the 3000 bullying reports made to the British National Workplace Bullying Advice Line last year were complaints against women. There are no gender-specific figures for Australia but local experts suggest they would be similar.

Psychologist Maxine Cornwall says: "Women are more methodical with their workplace bullying - short emails, standing over someone, giving them the silent treatment. It's a lot more cloak-and-dagger style than men's."

Nevertheless, the male workplace bully is alive and well. "Men are more openly aggressive - yelling, intimidating others with their size. Everyone is likely to know if your male boss dislikes you."

BBC NEWS Business Bullied workers suffer 'battle stress'

What do soldiers under fire and bullied workers have in common?

Not much, you may think.

However research from a leading psychologist suggests that bullied workers go through the very same emotions and stresses as battle-scarred troopers.

Dr Noreen Tehrani has counselled victims of the troubles in Northern Ireland, soldiers returning from combat overseas and victims of workplace bullying.

"The symptoms displayed by people who have been in conflict situations and workplaces where bullying happens are strikingly similar," Dr Tehrani told BBC News Online.

"Both groups suffer nightmares, are jumpy and seem fuelled by too much adrenaline.

"In addition, they show greater susceptibility to illnesses, heart disease and alcoholism."

The favoured definition of bullying amongst psychologists is persistent devaluing demeaning or harassing of someone at work.

Disorder

To back up her years of experience, Dr Tehrani conducted a study of 165 professionals in the caring sector such as nurses and social workers.

Dr Tehrani found that 36% of the men and 42% of the women reported having experienced bullying.

Overall, one in five people exhibited the main symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

According to Dr Tehrani, the three signs of PTSD are hyper arousal, a feeling of constant anxiety and over-vigilance; avoidance of anything to do with the traumatising event; and re-experiencing, in which subjects suffer flashbacks or obsessive thoughts concerning the trauma.

Early signs of workplace bullying are sickness and absenteeism, Dr Tehrani added.

Inflict pain

Bullying can take many forms from malicious gossiping to overt physical violence.

"Generally, male bullies indulge in quite physical and loud verbal bullying," said Dr Tehrani.

"Female bullies favour a strictly psychological approach to inflicting pain on others such as gossip and persistent criticism."

Interestingly, the image of the bullying boss terrorising staff doesn't paint the whole picture.

"Bullying managers grab the headlines, but it also occurs between people on the same grade or even on occasions subordinates can intimidate their boss."

Sick

There are no hard and fast estimates as to how much workplace bullying costs the UK economy.

However, research conducted for the British Occupational Health Research Foundation (BOHRF) by the Lancaster University Management School and UMIST in 2002 suggested that bullying in the UK workplace is rife.

The research found that one in 10 people had been bullied at work within the previous six months.

Bullied employees take, on average, seven days per year more sick leave than others.

"The cost to firms must be astronomical, many millions of pounds, and that doesn't include the mental impact on workers," said Professor Cary Cooper, co-author of the study.

In addition, it appears that bullying can have a negative impact on observers.

"Our research showed that witnesses to the bullying suffered many of the same mental problems as the people being bullied," said Professor Cooper.

Public spectre

Bullying was found to be particularly prevalent in the police, prison service, teaching and healthcare professions.

The government is so worried about the problem of bullying in the public sector that is has given the Amicus trade union £1m to conduct research into its causes.

Patricia Hewitt, Trade and Industry Secretary, called workplace bullying "a terrible issue with terrible consequences".

The BOHRF study singled out the postal service as a hotbed of workplace bullying.

Stung by the findings, Allan Leighton, Royal Mail chairman, launched a programme in January 2003 to stamp out bullying amongst the firms 200,000 staff.

"Quite frankly I've been appalled by the cases of bullying I have heard about since I joined Royal Mail. These have been some of the worst cases I have heard about in my working life. There can be no excuses," Mr Leighton said at the time.

A crack squad of harassment investigators and a 24 hour bullying helpline were set up by the Royal Mail.

"We recognised that we had a problem and that a change in culture was needed," Christine Gregory, Royal Mail spokeswoman, told BBC News Online.

"Ending bullying brings huge advantages for us, it should reduce absenteeism and boost productivity

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I have been bullied by a female boss but no one else could see it because it was done behind closed doors and through persistent criticism and inducing a feeling in me that I was no good at my job, a failure. It's very hard to stamp out this sort of bullying because the victim will not be believed and is always cast in a bad light. There is a lot of this in the profession I work in - market research. Surprising? We are supposed to be objective and open minded but in this business, sexism, racism and egotism among bosses is rife. I have had 3 sexist bosses one of whom was also racist.
Anne, Kent, UK

Standing Up to the Bully Boss

Push back

Respond assertively as soon as someone bullies you. Most bullies will start to push you gently and then gradually increase pressure. Bullies most often respond best to being bullied so being assertive is the best approach. They might not like you, but they will respect you and they will stop the bullying.

Use "I feel" statements

Use a phrase such as: "When you shout at me I feel annoyed and want to be aggressive but as you are my manager that would be inappropriate. You will find that I work better when I am spoken to reasonably".

Using "I feel" statements makes it non-negotiable because that is the way you feel.

Disarm with courtesy

If the above suggestion is too dangerous in terms of your career, then you can just say politely: "I would be grateful if you did not shout."

Put the problem back on your boss.

For example, if you are given an epithet such as "you're stupid" or "you're hopeless" you could respond with: "That's an interesting comment. I wonder why you felt obliged to make it." This puts the problem back on your boss. Or you can use the agreement technique "You could be right. However, my track record says I am good at x,y,z". The fact that you have a track record attests to your intelligence and not your stupidity.

Deflect the negative

You could just make a comment such as "how disappointing". It means nothing but it does get the bully to think.

Importance of body language

When you are working with bullies ensure that your body language supports your comments. Make sure your shoulders are parallel with theirs and that you maintain high eye contact. If the latter is difficult, look at a spot in the middle of their forehead because if you are more than a metre away they will think you are looking directly at them.

Collective Response

If fear is running rife in your department because a tyrant is running it, then you and your colleagues should write a round robin memo to the tyrant's boss and CC the HR Department. The memo should outline the specific behaviours that you all find unacceptable. It should be unemotional, to the point and factual.

A boss, no matter how tyrannical, is only successful through his or her people and every organisation knows this. Whilst drastic, I would expect that you will only have to do this once.

Be successful.

Article with thanks to www.careerone.com.au

BullyBusters.org Workplace Bullying in the News

That's why, he says, the brilliant comeback line you think up right after a confrontation just won't work. Targets, he says, don't have the ability to be aggressive, so the bully ‚ who has trained and rehearsed his aggressions ‚ can always keep them off balance. And, he says, "Unless you were born that way, it's hard in middle age to become verbally aggressive."

Aggression, however, is exactly what will back a bully down. "They're cowards," Namie says. "But when you become like them, you've lost."

Instead, he offers these tips:

• Don't appease the bully or seek his or her approval. "You don't need their definition of you to survive."
   
• Don't backpedal, apologize or jump higher to please the bully.
   
• Don't expect human resources to be your ally.
   
• Do ask your co-workers to support you. "They can't fire everybody. It breaks the silence and makes it a normal, accountable world. But you've got to ask early. If you don't, it's like crying wolf. Use the power of the group to shame, humiliate and face down the bully."
   
• Do make a business case to higher-ups several levels above the bully, appealing to the company's mission, vision and values. "It's a dollars-and-cents issue on absenteeism, turnover, litigation costs, slowed productivity and intangibles like morale. Refine the message to make it unemotional, which is hard to do."
   
• Then, he says, take time off to heal. "You've got to be offsite and heal before you can go back and be able to make an unemotional business case."
   
• Be clear about your demands. "What do you need to be made whole and safe?"

If you follow the "Don't grieve, leave" pathway, she says, pursue ways to recover from the damage you sustained. And watch out for what she calls "leaking" ‚ carrying your old defenses and hurts into new situations. "Recognize that you are in a new workplace, and that's not the place to work on those issues."

And if, like targets A and B, you're uncertain about how to explain leaving your last position during a job interview, Keashly says, "Keep it professional. Focus on the work you love doing and finding an environment that will enable that work, not the messy details of the position you left." She suggests an approach along the lines of, "The nature of the work I was doing and the kind of support I got didn't match."

The Targets

Target A says:

"You can't keep your head in the sand about office politics. Know the dynamics of the upper-management people. I was there to do a job and didn't do the political thing. But not playing is a form of politics."
 

"As soon as things start happening, don't assume they'll go away. Document everything."

And Target B says:

"Bullies are like catalysts. They like to hit quickly and watch. If you get back in their face and let them know it's unacceptable, they'll back off."
 

"It's important to make complaints to the state unemployment offices, senators and attorneys general to help build a trend."

The Sydney Morning Herald Blogs Business Blog

But what are the worst examples of workplace bullying? How does it usually happen? The British-based Chartered Management Institute provides some clues. It has a study showing 11 types of bullying behavior.

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According to the study, Bullying in the workplace - the experience of managers , the most common type was misuse of power, followed by verbal insults and undermining by overloading or criticism. Other forms of bullying, in descending order, were

• unfair treatment,
• overbearing supervision,
• exclusion,
• spreading malicious rumours,
• blocking promotion or training opportunities,
• making threats about job security,
• sexual harassment,
• or physical intimidation and violence.

The study found that bullying is most prevalent among line managers. Personality and lack of management skills were usually cited as the main reasons.

So is this study on the money? What types of bullying have you seen or experienced? Who are usually the main culprits? Is it always the same kind of people in the same sorts of jobs?

Posted by Leon Gettler
November 8, 2006 9:35 AM

LATEST COMMENTS

I had a female supervisor once who definitely had "short people syndrome". Nobody did anything to hurt her, but she seemed to be determined to prove her worth as a short person and as a woman by bullying in the office; being a young shy girl, i copped it. She would do things like smoke - yes, in the office - and blow it in my face; get me to pull down lots of heavy folders one day when she'd heard me complaining of a bad back, only to put them all back up again straight afterwards because she'd "changed her mind"; threw papers deliberately across the office and told me to pick them up; yelled at me in front of clients for not doing any work or doing work improperly when actually I was doing exactly what she'd told me to do. What can i say ... i was young and it was my first job; i didn't know any better.

• Posted by: Mig at November 11, 2006 8:39 PM

I worked in the OHS/bullying area for a several years (my anti-bullying website is at www.sangrea.net/bully  in case anyone is interested).

Most workplace bullying cases fall into these categories (in no particular order):

1. The sadist: this could be a sociopathic personality or a person who feels inadequate and needs to brings another down to feel better (the power freak).

2. The agenda: this could be making life unpleasant for a worker so that the boss can hire a friend or someone with similar values. Plenty of workers are bullied between their 9th and 10th year of service to save on LSL.

3. The personality clash: obviously not everyone gets along.

4. The failed romance: the nature of the sparks between the protagonists change ...

5. Jealousy: talented workers can be bullied because they threaten a co-worker or supervisor.

6. Clumsy management: where the worker knows all the rules inside out and stretches them constantly, and is too cunning to be caught out. In frustration the manager may resort to bullying to oust him or her.

7. The chronic victim: this is the "Kick me" or "Shlemiel" type of person (As per Berne's definitions) who subconsciously invites attacks.

8. Mobbing: where a relatively homogenous work group tries to push an outsider right out.

Obviously the above categories can overlap or occur simultaneously.

It's after midnight and I'm a bit tired so I could easily have missed something obvious.

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I hate to say it but female bosses are worse than male bosses when it comes to attitude and bullying. I worked at a place that