|Home||Switchboard||Unix Administration||Red Hat||TCP/IP Networks||Neoliberalism||Toxic Managers|
|May the source be with you, but remember the KISS principle ;-)|
|News||Humor Chronicle||Corporate bullshit as a communication method||Dictionary of corporate bullshit||Office Diplomacy Lesson||Manifest of the Softpanorama IT Slacker Society||Ten Commandments of the IT Slackers Society|
|RFC 1925: The Twelve Networking Truths||Murphy's Laws||The Cuckoo's Egg||BSD Logo Story||SYSTEM PROBLEM REPORT||The Unix Hierarchy||Unix was a Program Gone Bad|
|NETSLAVE QUIZ||Interview with a hacker||GURU||The Unix Cult||Top 10 Classic Unix Humor||Six Types of Troubles with bosses||Santa as sysadmin|
|The Sysadmin Price List||Classic Computer Humor||Know Your Unix System Administrator||Best Russian Programmer Humor||ARE YOU A BBS ADDICT?||Object oriented programmers of all nations -- encapsulate||The Evolution of a Programmer, from High School to CEO|
|A letter from a programmer wife||DNS Commandments||"Mountain View California" (Sung to the tune "Hotel California" by the Eagles)||Freudian Send in e-mail Flame Wars||The Worst Job in the World||vi himor||The Corporate Jungles Of Cubonia|
|The Perl Purity Test||THE TOP 25 THINGS PROGRAMMERS SAY||Financial Humor Bulletin, 2008||Linux Sucks Humor||Real Programmers Humor||Microsoft plans to buy Catholic Church||Financial Humor Bulletin, 2010|
|Miscellaneous Unproductive Time Classification||"Linux Sucks" Humor||Networking humor||Solaris humor||Orthodox Unixoid definition||Algorithms||Editors humor|
|RMS||Linus Torvalds||Larry Wall & Perl||GPL humor||Information Passing||Customer calls a UNIX consultant with a question||Man page for Unix baby command|
|OFM Humor||Wisdom for Grads||SE Humor||Unix And C Are Jokes||Viruses||Eric Raymond||Etc|
It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during discussions of working matters with their coworkers. Due to complaints received, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with coworkers. Therefore, a list of preferred new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending more sensitive employees.
PREFERRED: Yes, we really should discuss it...
OLD: Oh, no. Another fucking meeting!
PREFERRED: It would be difficult for me to work late today...
OLD: When the fuck do you expect this?
PREFERRED: I'm certain that it's not feasible...
OLD: No fucking way.
PREFERRED: I wasn't involved...
OLD: Its not my fucking problem.
PREFERRED: That's interesting change...
OLD: Who, fuck, changed this setting?!?!
PREFERRED: I'm not sure that we can implement this.
OLD: Go to hell, it won't work.
PREFERRED: It would be difficult to accommodate my schedule.
OLD: Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?
PREFERRED: Are you sure that this is a problem?
OLD: Who the hell cares?
PREFERRED: I'm a bit overloaded at this moment.
OLD: Hell, I'm on salary.
PREFERRED: I love a challenge.
OLD: It sucks.
PREFERRED: You want me to take care of that?
OLD: Who the hell made you boss?
PREFERRED: I don't think this matter much.
OLD: I really don't give a shit.
PREFERRED: He's somewhat insensitive to customer needs
OLD: He's a fucking prick.
PREFERRED: She's an aggressive go getter.
OLD: She's a bitch.
PREFERRED: I think you could benefit from some training.
OLD: You seems don't know what the fuck you're doing.
Google matched content
FAIR USE NOTICE This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, etc. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit exclusivly for research and educational purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.
ABUSE: IPs or network segments from which we detect a stream of probes might be blocked for no less then 90 days. Multiple types of probes increase this period.
Groupthink : Two Party System as Polyarchy : Corruption of Regulators : Bureaucracies : Understanding Micromanagers and Control Freaks : Toxic Managers : Harvard Mafia : Diplomatic Communication : Surviving a Bad Performance Review : Insufficient Retirement Funds as Immanent Problem of Neoliberal Regime : PseudoScience : Who Rules America : Neoliberalism : The Iron Law of Oligarchy : Libertarian Philosophy
War and Peace : Skeptical Finance : John Kenneth Galbraith :Talleyrand : Oscar Wilde : Otto Von Bismarck : Keynes : George Carlin : Skeptics : Propaganda : SE quotes : Language Design and Programming Quotes : Random IT-related quotes : Somerset Maugham : Marcus Aurelius : Kurt Vonnegut : Eric Hoffer : Winston Churchill : Napoleon Bonaparte : Ambrose Bierce : Bernard Shaw : Mark Twain Quotes
Vol 25, No.12 (December, 2013) Rational Fools vs. Efficient Crooks The efficient markets hypothesis : Political Skeptic Bulletin, 2013 : Unemployment Bulletin, 2010 : Vol 23, No.10 (October, 2011) An observation about corporate security departments : Slightly Skeptical Euromaydan Chronicles, June 2014 : Greenspan legacy bulletin, 2008 : Vol 25, No.10 (October, 2013) Cryptolocker Trojan (Win32/Crilock.A) : Vol 25, No.08 (August, 2013) Cloud providers as intelligence collection hubs : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2010 : Inequality Bulletin, 2009 : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2008 : Copyleft Problems Bulletin, 2004 : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2011 : Energy Bulletin, 2010 : Malware Protection Bulletin, 2010 : Vol 26, No.1 (January, 2013) Object-Oriented Cult : Political Skeptic Bulletin, 2011 : Vol 23, No.11 (November, 2011) Softpanorama classification of sysadmin horror stories : Vol 25, No.05 (May, 2013) Corporate bullshit as a communication method : Vol 25, No.06 (June, 2013) A Note on the Relationship of Brooks Law and Conway Law
Fifty glorious years (1950-2000): the triumph of the US computer engineering : Donald Knuth : TAoCP and its Influence of Computer Science : Richard Stallman : Linus Torvalds : Larry Wall : John K. Ousterhout : CTSS : Multix OS Unix History : Unix shell history : VI editor : History of pipes concept : Solaris : MS DOS : Programming Languages History : PL/1 : Simula 67 : C : History of GCC development : Scripting Languages : Perl history : OS History : Mail : DNS : SSH : CPU Instruction Sets : SPARC systems 1987-2006 : Norton Commander : Norton Utilities : Norton Ghost : Frontpage history : Malware Defense History : GNU Screen : OSS early history
The Peter Principle : Parkinson Law : 1984 : The Mythical Man-Month : How to Solve It by George Polya : The Art of Computer Programming : The Elements of Programming Style : The Unix Haterís Handbook : The Jargon file : The True Believer : Programming Pearls : The Good Soldier Svejk : The Power Elite
Most popular humor pages:
Manifest of the Softpanorama IT Slacker Society : Ten Commandments of the IT Slackers Society : Computer Humor Collection : BSD Logo Story : The Cuckoo's Egg : IT Slang : C++ Humor : ARE YOU A BBS ADDICT? : The Perl Purity Test : Object oriented programmers of all nations : Financial Humor : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2008 : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2010 : The Most Comprehensive Collection of Editor-related Humor : Programming Language Humor : Goldman Sachs related humor : Greenspan humor : C Humor : Scripting Humor : Real Programmers Humor : Web Humor : GPL-related Humor : OFM Humor : Politically Incorrect Humor : IDS Humor : "Linux Sucks" Humor : Russian Musical Humor : Best Russian Programmer Humor : Microsoft plans to buy Catholic Church : Richard Stallman Related Humor : Admin Humor : Perl-related Humor : Linus Torvalds Related humor : PseudoScience Related Humor : Networking Humor : Shell Humor : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2011 : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2012 : Financial Humor Bulletin, 2013 : Java Humor : Software Engineering Humor : Sun Solaris Related Humor : Education Humor : IBM Humor : Assembler-related Humor : VIM Humor : Computer Viruses Humor : Bright tomorrow is rescheduled to a day after tomorrow : Classic Computer Humor
The Last but not Least
Copyright © 1996-2016 by Dr. Nikolai Bezroukov. www.softpanorama.org was created as a service to the UN Sustainable Development Networking Programme (SDNP) in the author free time. This document is an industrial compilation designed and created exclusively for educational use and is distributed under the Softpanorama Content License.
Original materials copyright belong to respective owners. Quotes are made for educational purposes only in compliance with the fair use doctrine.
FAIR USE NOTICE This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available to advance understanding of computer science, IT technology, economic, scientific, and social issues. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of any such copyrighted material as provided by section 107 of the US Copyright Law according to which such material can be distributed without profit exclusively for research and educational purposes.
This is a Spartan WHYFF (We Help You For Free) site written by people for whom English is not a native language. Grammar and spelling errors should be expected. The site contain some broken links as it develops like a living tree...
|You can use PayPal to make a contribution, supporting development of this site and speed up access. In case softpanorama.org is down you can use the at softpanorama.info|
The statements, views and opinions presented on this web page are those of the author (or referenced source) and are not endorsed by, nor do they necessarily reflect, the opinions of the author present and former employers, SDNP or any other organization the author may be associated with. We do not warrant the correctness of the information provided or its fitness for any purpose.
Created June 1, 2005; Last modified: September 12, 2017